Hi all who may read this...

Ummm.... I guess I will start this wih the fact that I am starting back to school this semester. My new major will be in Business with a concentration in Information Systems. This seems like a good major, and it contains courses that are new to me, and I just want to see how it is. I don't know.

I suppose the main focal point of this journal is to inform all or some of my friends of these changes... and maybe more to come.

I don't really know what is taking place in my life right now at this moment. There are a lot of things that are new to me. Some things that I have encountered/dealt with in the past and are now back again to be dealt with. And, I guess some stuff that remains the same as usual.

One thing that is new is living with Steven (my boyfriend). Not just the fact of living with Steven, more the fact of living with the one you are involved with (the boyfriend part). There are things that I have never had to worry/think about before that now come up (as I did expect). Such things like... going to be at times that are convenient and not staying up till I am just tired. Since he has to be up early every morning... and I don't. I don't mond this, but it is something hard for me to do, since I don't fall asleep easily, and I don't get tired all that easy either. He on the other hand, is tired at night, and he falls asleep almost as soon as his head hits the pillow. Often times, I lay there and just listen to random noises that may occur, or just think... which I don't really like to do lol... Anyways, I guess I am just still trying to adjust to this.

Something that is now re-accuring.... I suppose the thing here that bears the most impact would be bills. I Still have my old Credit card bill, and things like that, but now, I am also responsible for rent, cell phone, home phone, and electricity too. (only a third of the rent and utilities and home phone though).. but this is enough to make me have to really watch my spending alot. And with me starting back to school, I won't be able to work as much, which will impact the funds. I tool out more of a student loan than I really need in leu of ths change, and I will keep it and use it for said expenses as I need to. I did have an illusion of actually doing something for spring break with it, or getting a couple things I have really wanted/needed for a while... but I guess I will just forget about those things. It's okay though. I will make it.

There are other things that are new to me too... I occasionally feel as though I am really changing inside as well. My tastes in clothing has definately changed, I know that... I now wear clothes that show me, not hide me (of course, losing weight will do that I guess). My tastes in music... I still listen to all the rock/metal that I have always enjoyed... but I find myself wanting to listen to a lot of other types of music quite often. Now, I have always listened to a wide range of music... but I tend to listen to other things more often. I am listening to more punk type music, and a lot more pop than I would have ever imagined before. I don't really know why... but I like it a lot more... Laugh if you want to, I don't care. lol

Man this is long.

I almost fear some of the changes that I "predict" in the future... I don't know what kinds of things will also begin to change, and I don't really know what is around the next corner, and if I am going to like how things turn out. More importantly, I don't know what kinds of impacts these changes are going to inflict upon those around me.

I often wonder if I am one of those people everyone hates who just never stays the same, and is so unpredictable you can't trust them. And if I am going to do something stupid... or if I am going to lose control of myself and just go on a spree of out-of-character actions and such...

I hope that those of you reading this don't get upset with me for this... but I just wanted to get it down, and see if it helps me sort things out some or something... I dunno.... It may even be a sub-conscious way of getting things out to everyone or something.... *sigh

Anyway, I have went on long enough.... and it is 4:35 in the morning....

Far the well,
Anthony